- Picture yourself standing face to face with your mother. Notice any chords, ropes or chains that attach the two of you. Notice any barriers between you.
- Invoke the energy of total unconditional love. Imagine the two of you – you and your mother — surrounded by total love. [Another way to do this is to invite a wise, holy Being to join the two of you, one that represents total love for you, such as Christ, Buddha or Higher Power. As you go through steps 3-5 below, you can ask the Being or Higher Power to dissolve the chords and bridge the gap for you.]
- Draw on the energy of total unconditional love to dissolve any chords of attachment and any barriers between your mother and yourself. Continue until you can see that you are now each standing free of one another.
- Draw on the energy of total love to bridge the gap between the love you needed and the love you got. Allow yourself to fully receive this love. Continue this until you can see that you are filled with all the love you need. (If there is any resistance or additional need, this step should be repeated daily for 30 days.)
- Draw on the energy of total love to bridge the gap between the love your mother needed and the love she got. Continue this until you can see that your mother is filled with all the love she needs.
- Visualize you and your mother holding hands. Looking into her eyes, see that your mother gave what she could. See the perfection in what she gave you. See the perfection in what you received. Convey to your mother the forgiveness in your heart.
- Visualize you and your mother in a beautiful nature setting. Visualize the two of you embracing, so that total unconditional love radiates through both of you. Give thanks for any healing you received in this process.
*Adapted from a Forgiveness Process used at the Center for Attitudinal Healing in Sausalito, CA, © 2003, based on the work of Ruth Carter Stapleton.
© Eileen Barker 2012
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EILEEN BARKER is an internationally recognized mediator, facilitator, forgiveness teacher and pioneer in the movement to integrate emotional healing and forgiveness in conflict resolution. In addition to her popular workshops and retreats, Eileen offers private forgiveness coaching. She is the author of the Forgiveness Workbook.
